We come in hot.
The walking thirst Matt James took the reins as the sexiest man in America for the next few months with the start of season 25 of ‘The Bachelor’.
And his girls are excited: it looks like this is going to be the hottest season in Bachelor history. One of the contestants brought Matt a vibrator, one made a dumb “WAP” reference. One came out of the limo with lace lingerie and Matt chose her gown. Someone called him Dad in a promo. We like to see it.
Although they are on the cold East Coast (Bachelor Mansion has temporarily moved to a luxury resort in Pennsylvania), this season looks spicy with drama. And luckily for us, it only comes 13 days after the finale of ‘The Bachelorette’.
Here’s what went down on night one.
Meet Matt
Unless you follow Tyler Cameron – Matt’s BFF – on Instagram, most longtime viewers were not familiar with Matt tonight. He is bisexual and was raised by a single mother in North Carolina. He played football at Wake Forest University, lives in New York City and is a volunteer with children. He’s the first black Bachelor in history, and it weighs him down: “I don’t want to piss black people, I do not want white people to piss,” he told Chris Harrison.
Meet the ladies
Thirty-two women quarantined for weeks and took four COVID-19 tests in hopes of sharing drops with Matt. There were some real winners, like Mari: “Have you ever met anyone and just do not know what to say?” Matt said after she walked away. Magi has come all the way from Ethiopia to be on the program.
Chelsea wore the gown out of her gown.
Many have played head-to-head in an apparent competition for the most absurdly spelled names – look at you, Pieper, Khaylah and Kali. But it’s a competition for love, not misplaced vocals. In this section, we focus on the text that is executed to grab Matt’s attention:
- Anna for him a survival package with real “red flags” for him to wave to women.
- Khaylah, who, like Matt from North Carolina, arrived in a pickup truck.
- Alicia, a ballerina from NYC, danced her out of the limo.
- Alana brought spaghetti and gave him a “Lady and the Tramp” kiss.
- Kali walked in a lace bra and shorts. Matt helped her choose between two gowns. “Damn,” he said as she walked away. “You have to love a woman with confidence.”
- MJ tried to drive up in a pizza delivery car with a pie in hand, but was excluded.
- Katie brought Matt a vibrator ‘because it brought her through the pandemic.’
- Kimberly brought a big fish and threw it to Matt for a reason I do not understand.
- ‘Queen’ Victoria was carried on a throne and wore a tiara – and then she fell down the stairs.
The cocktail party
As an introduction, Matt leads his ladies in prayer instead of a toast on their journey. Then the women go to war “may I steal him for a moment”. God bless them.
He talked to Sarah about how he struggles with the expectations of being perfect. When Mari trusts him about her family in Puerto Rico dealing with the hurricanes, Katie and her vibrator interrupt.
Khaylah continued to milk her hometown benefit and shared a toast sweet tea with her husband. ‘Princess’ Kit tried the same strategy and donated a NYC-themed snowball – though Queen V pushed her out and then harassed some ladies for not getting time alone with Matt. I go out on a limb and say that one is not here to make friends. She works overtime for the villain editorial staff.
Bri and Matt were related to their similar upbringing: she is also bisexual and was raised by split parents.
The first (real) kiss
But it was Abigail who stole his heart: after revealing that she was partially deaf and carrying cochlear implants, Matt was honored that she had opened him up.
He could not take his eyes off her, and kiss them.
The first impression rose
No surprise, this one is also after Abigail.
The rose ceremony
A bunch of very solid ladies got roses like Bri, Mari, Chelsea and Kristin. But * joint groan * Victoria also got one. At least we know in advance who’s just here to cause trouble in the house – but they usually do not catch up in the last five weeks.
Forecast
I think the first one-on-one will go to someone who got Matt’s attention but didn’t get a lot of time with him tonight, like Chelsea. But the promotions showed that more women came in and cried a lot, a real mess of the producers. Tie.