FKA Twigs says she left behind panic attacks after her alleged abusive relationship with Shia LaBeouf.
The British singer gave a full account for the first time of the “fear and shame” she felt during her nine-month romance with the actor.
And she revealed that she only had the courage to leave LaBeouf after calling a helpline for abuse.
In an interview with Louis Theroux on his BBC Radio 4 podcast “Grounded”, she claims that LaBeouf forbade her to look other men in the eye – and isolated her from friends and family.
She felt she was ‘the worst person ever’ – and thought no one would believe her after bystanders could not help when LeBeouf allegedly strangled her at a petrol station.
“I really felt like it was impossible to leave, I felt so in control … it was absolutely overwhelming,” she said.
The couple met on the set of the movie “Honey Boy” in 2018 and split in May 2019.
In December 2020, Twigs announced that she was suing LeBeouf for sexual battery, assault and inflicting emotional distress.
She told Theroux there was “an intense honeymoon period at the beginning” before LaBeouf’s behavior became abusive.
She said she gradually became aware that he was becoming more “jealous and controlling,” noting that the “little things you could do wrong that could take away from happiness.”
‘For me it was nice to be with a waiter or to be polite to someone who can be seen flanking or [wanting] to have a kind of relationship with someone else when I am literally just ordering pasta and being polite, ”she said.
‘I was told I knew what he was like, and if I loved him, I would not look men in the eye. So it was my reality for a good four months towards the end of the relationship, that I could not look men in the eye. ‘
The star said she started looking at the ground when the couple went out together and started isolating her from her friends and family, adding: ‘I just had a lot of regiment and contained the life that made me feel like I was the least in trouble. ‘
LaBeouf – who according to Page Six was reportedly removed from the lawsuit after all the promotion for his latest film, the Oscar forerunner ‘Pieces of a Woman’, also expected her to meet a daily quota of love, claims his.
Twigs said: ‘He said his previous partner had met this number very well, and I was inadequate … it was 20 times, 20 kisses a day, which strengthened my devotion to him and my devotion, which is exhausting, because you can ‘not be natural. ”
“He will wake me up at night to accuse me of all sorts of things,” she said. ‘Accuse me of staring at the ceiling and thinking of ways to leave him, he’s accusing me of masturbating … [accuse] I want to be with someone else – but I would always say that between four and seven in the morning. ”
She locked up in London while trying to recover, as she admitted: ‘For a long time, everything that woke me up at night, even if it was just my dog, or a noise outside or just after the bathroom had to go. , it can cause a very intense panic attack. ”
She said she’s left with [post-traumatic stress disorder] out of it, which again is just something I do not think we really talk about as a society, only in terms of healing when you leave, and how much work needs to be done to recover, to get back to the person who you were before. ”
A ‘turning point’ came when she called a helpline and was taken seriously, she said, adding that she wanted to tell her daughter that she was dealing with the abuse.
LeBeouf told the New York Times that many of Twigs’ allegations were untrue, but said he owed her and Karolyn Pho, another woman whose claims in the lawsuit, “the opportunity to make their statements. to make public and [for me to] accept responsibility for the things I did. ”
In another statement, he added: ‘I can not tell anyone how my behavior made them feel. I have no excuses for my alcoholism or aggression, but only rationalizations. ”
He said he had been insulting myself and everyone around me for years. I have a history of hurting the people closest to me. I am ashamed of that history and am sorry for those I have hurt. There’s nothing else I can really say. ”
Page Six released LaBeouf for comment.