Parents can use extra emotional and logistical support during the pandemic.
But fathers are significantly more likely to say they need emotional support throughout the pandemic than mothers, according to a new survey from the American Psychological Association.
In general, 75% of parents with children under the age of 18 said they could use more emotional support, including a friend, family member or mental health professional you can go to if you are worried or upset, according to the APA ‘ Stress in America’s report published Thursday.
More specifically, 82% of fathers said they needed more support than they had received since the pandemic started, while only 68% of mothers surveyed said the same.
So, what’s there with this difference?
To begin with, a lot of research has shown that men tend to have smaller social support networks than women, Dr Lynn Bufka, APA’s senior director of transformation and quality of practice, told CNBC Make It.
“Many men’s social support and social commitments usually tend to come from work and their partners,” says Bufka.
Since many people work remotely during the pandemic, there are fewer opportunities to communicate with friends in the workplace.
Women are also less available to their partners during this time, as this indicates that women have taken on more responsibilities during the pandemic, Bufka said.
In fact, a recent study among 31,141 people from five countries found that women, especially mothers, spend more time on “necessities” such as childcare and household chores during the pandemic than men.
Part of this has to do with the way men and women are socialized to divide household roles inside and out, Bufka says. Other literature has shown that the person in a couple who has the more flexible job tends to take on more responsibilities, she says. (It is not clear how many of the 3,000 American adults admitted to the APA survey, conducted in mid-February, are in married or heterosexual couples.)
“If you put it this way, you have men who are more likely to trust their female partner, who have now taken on many more responsibilities during the pandemic,” Bufka says. “And men have less access to sources of support through work.”
On the other hand, mothers were more likely to say that their mental health had deteriorated compared to before the pandemic, according to the study. Nearly half of the mothers (47%) who have children at home who study at a distance reported that their mental health deteriorated, while 30% of the fathers with children at home said the same.
In a separate survey published in December, it was found that working mothers are 28% more likely to burn out than fathers.
Ultimately, it keeps effects spreading too thin in real time. As childcare and schools were closed due to the pandemic, many women were forced to leave their jobs due to the increased demands at home. The total number of women leaving the labor force since the start of the pandemic reached more than 2.3 million in January.
Bufka encourages people (perhaps those who do not have young children at home) to help their parents.
“Know that the people who have young children who are struggling do not necessarily know that you can play a little outside with the children,” she says.
For people with children, “really think through: is there anyone who can give us support? What would it look like? What would really make a difference?” she suggests.
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