DEAR ABBY: My son’s new wife – who has a daughter – insisted that his two children were not biologically his. After a DNA test, it appears she was right. They are not. My son, my husband and I are sad. His twins are ten and do not understand what is going on.
My husband and I try to stay gentle in their lives with phone calls and limited visits. My son’s wife refuses to visit us until we stop communicating with the children, promises never to talk about it and does not display any photos in our house. She is also trying to convince our son to stop seeing us. What to do? – DISAPPOINTED IN TEXAS
DEAR DISAPPOINTMENT: The children, no matter who their father is, were raised and believe that you and your husband are their grandparents. If you love them, do not kneel before your son’s new wife’s son, otherwise this will only be the beginning of how she will try to control you.
She does not have the right to prescribe with whom you (or your son, for that matter) see and communicate. She also has no right to order you to remove any object from your home.
If your son prefers to turn his back on those kids, it’s just the decision he can make. If he also prefers to turn his back on you, then you picked up a meal instead of a man.
DEAR ABBY: I am a married man and I love my wife. Due to the unfortunate circumstances we are not living together at the moment.
When I am far away from her, I become extremely lonely. I have a co-worker who has become a good friend, and I have feelings for her. I told her how I felt, and we hung out a few times – nothing sexual. Now she pulls away, and I feel sad. How should I trade? I fight back tears for someone I disagree with. What should I do? – HEART PANTS IN THE EAST
DEAR HARTBROKEN: A relationship does not have to be sexual to be meaningful, and your co-worker has filled an empty space in your life. That you feel a sense of loss and sadness that she is moving is not surprising. Because I do not know the unfortunate circumstances that caused the separation between you and your wife, I can only advise you to look for a way to repair fences or change the circumstances so that you can live together again, because it goes without saying with you your own. If this is not possible, you need to think seriously about how you plan to live the rest of your life, because this way does not work.
DEAR ABBY: I was at a video conference with our boss and two colleagues the other day. When “Joan” got on the call, “something” was hanging from one of her nostrils. She may have had a cold. I scratched my nose and mustache a few times and tried to warn her about what was happening, in vain. She did not respond. No one else said anything.
What would have been the correct protocol? Should I have left it alone, or was it right that I tried to let her know? I did what I personally would have done. Did I have to text her privately? Please advise. – TELECOMMUTING WILD DEAR TELECOMMUTING: If you were the person with the leaking nose, you would not want to know? Yes, you should have texted her.
Dear Abby was written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.dearAbby.com or PO Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.